Bromwell High has been classified by the ABC as M. It is not recommended for persons under 15 years. It contains coarse language.

Episodes: 1-3 | 4-6 | 7-9 | 10-13

Valentine's Day

It's Valentine's Day at Bromwell High but Natella has persuaded our laydeez to give it a miss this year on the basis that it is a meaningless market event created by greeting card companies to boost sales figures. Keisha and Latrina are none too pleased with Natella when Miss Dickson decides to banish all pupils without cards to "ugly class", but things start to look up for the girls as Davis - the coolest boy in the school - is seen putting a Valentine's card in Keisha and Natella's box. Who is meant for?

Meanwhile, Iqbal and Bibby are being pursued by the mother of a pupil who fell into a hole in the playground because she could not read the six-foot danger sign next to it. Bibby needs a scapegoat to stand up in court and take the rap and unwisely decides upon the witless and weak-willed Martin Jackson.

Fire Drill

Keisha's fascination with pyromania has spiralled out of control and she is unable to stop herself setting fire to things, including the school premises. Iqbal's real problems start, however, when one of Keisha's fires inadvertently highlights the fact that Bromwell High has no wheelchair access.

Natella is outraged and spearheads a lobbying group, "The Inhalers Club", to campaign against the injustice, but her interfering riles the infamous school bully, Aisha, who embarks on a quest to mash her up. Iqbal and Bibby reluctantly agree to rectify the situation, but when they discover that they can become eligible for E.U. funding by employing wheelchair-bound teachers, they embark on a particularly politically incorrect recruitment drive.

No More Teachers

After a sensational performance at the school music evening, Mr Anderson, the English teacher, is offered a career as a pop star, leaving the rest of the teachers to ponder their own pathetic and unrewarding careers in the classroom. Depressed and dreaming of pastures new, they resign with immediate effect on their own very personal routes to fame and fortune, and Iqbal is faced with the problem of replacing an entire staff.

Meanwhile, the local education authority advises that Bromwell High must enter a talented pupil in the National Schools Music Competition. Keisha is selected but Natella is, as always, desperate to take part.

Will Natella betray Keisha in a bid for musical stardom? And can Iqbal really substitute the teachers with monkeys?

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